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Be your authentic self- not a fake version.

 Morning everyone!

Do you ever wake up in the morning and have no clue what day it is? I just realised it’s Friday, so it’s blog day, and I know exactly what I want to talk about.

Esse Quam Videri was my school motto. It means ‘to be, rather than to seem’. I saw it quoted on social media this morning, and it reminded me of my school days.

When I was at school, I tried to fit in like everyone else. I had a small group of close friends, but I wasn’t one of the popular girls. I felt awkward in my own skin because I wasn’t particularly pretty or clever; I wasn’t sporty or gifted in art; I was just ordinary with a horrendous A-line navy skirt that did me no favours.

My domestic science teacher told me that it was good that I chose an alternative to cooking because my cooking skills were appalling, and my French teacher said that a grammar school education was wasted on me because I was likely to be just a housewife. I usually came near the bottom of the class in end-of-term exams, and I never really achieved anything. I managed average grades in O levels and didn’t stay on for A’s, I went to college instead for three months before opting out and getting a job. That’s my education in a nutshell.

I’ve spent years wondering what I should do with my life, and then I became a foster carer, then a birth mum, and then an adoptive mum. Then I realised that I had a passion for interior design and started transforming our house, on a very tight budget, into a home. Over the next thirty-five years, I have developed skills I never knew I had, and I have learnt wallpapering, upholstery, plastering, tiling, laying flooring, and fixing stuff whilst raising four children and fostering other kids. 

I write books, too. Forgot to say that. Seventy-two books, actually and the second one is coming out in October.

My jobs have mainly been looking after people, caring for youngsters, trying to find adoptive homes for desperate children and being the best parent I can be, not just to my kids, but to other waifs and strays that have been dumped on by their parents.

I’ve stopped apologising for being authentically me, and I like myself more now than I did when I was sixteen. I am always straight up and direct, which some people don’t like. My books have swear words that some people don’t like either, and I like badass films, especially if they have anything to do with the Vikings. I’m proud to say that I have Viking blood. But I also go to church. Some people think I should be more polite and agreeable because I’m married to a pastor; I think I should be authentically me every day, in every situation, whether I am at work or in church. My husband agrees. Fake people are everywhere, but I am not one of them, neither is my husband,

Esse Quam Videri; be who you are, not a fake version of yourself to please others.




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